"I love you. I will marry you." If only I could hold on to that right now. If only this can be possible. If only I am not in this present darkness forever wondering when I will see the light. If only he is not actually living under one roof with her, sleeping in the same bed. If only I haven't know how much he loved her, how much he still loves her. If only he hasn't actually shared a life with her, something that still keeps him there. If only I do not love him enough to be this selfish and greedy for everything that he is. If only he can let me go. I really want to go already. I'd rather be alone and lonely...