Friday, December 3, 2010

I grieve over the fact that he is not strong enough to make decisions for us. For our love which as he said has changed him to be a better person. I am grieving, but I understand him perfectly. As much as my heart would want to resent his cowardice, I do understand. That is why I am making plans on my own. That is why I am trying to be brave as I look at the road ahead. I cannot wait on him forever. If that is the life that he chose, then he must live it. I cannot be part of it forever waiting in vain like a prisoner in a death row.

Happiness is a decision. Of course. And so I decide to hope for a better future. I will find it. Or if not, I will walk along until it finds me. I deserve a love that knows no bounds and limits. I deserve a love that doesn’t bring with it unnecessary pain. I deserve a love that will make me sing and dance freely, however way my heart would dictate it. I deserve a love that will want no one else but me.

I have a free spirit. So free it is a crime to want to keep it in a dungeon forever.