Saturday, October 9, 2010

It will never happen. He cannot actually give up everything for me. I do not really need him to actually do that. But it would have made a difference to hear him say it with conviction. It would have made me want to really stay. But just like the typical man, he is concerned of keeping everything in his territory. Family is territory, a sort of comfort zone, an identity. And as long as he can keep it and at the same time, keep me, life would be bearable if not too perfect. It is continually scaring me to trust him because of that. There seems to be nothing that I can hold on to to make me confident enough to make a choice and choose him. And choose to stay with him.